The Confidence Factor for Women: Paralyzed by Self Doubt

Imagine — The perfect opportunity to accelerate your success is at your finger tips, and tomorrow is showtime. For most women, the self doubt begins during the countdown phase.

  • “What should I say?”
  • “What if they say no?”
  • “Let me research some more”

The messages and images of consistent self doubt become clearer as it begins to paralyze you into the belief that you cannot achieve the one thing you have been dreaming of. As women, we befriend pessimism and allow it to talk us out of living life on our own terms. We allow the chatter to haunt us and tell us to be “realistic.”

One of the pressing issues we consistently come across in the Confidence Factor for Women in Leadership is the issue of over-preparation and scripted success. The feeling of the lack of readiness and need for more preparation to walk into high level rooms and/or opportunities. The feeling of overriding authenticity to settle for scripted success that will “hopefully” please the leaders at the table.

However, it is unrealistic to walk into leadership without authenticity. I listen to the fearful doubts of women who will limit their success in order to have a “perfect script” in order to walk into a room, where no one would truly know the questions that will be asked. Understandably, women need more hand holding in order to find and endorse their confidence, however, scripted success requires you to live up to a fictitious character that was used to get the part, but how do you maintain that character long term.

I want you to remember these three things -

1. Be An Authentic Leader: The feeling of self doubt is natural, however, if you are always seeking an artificial source of confidence through a “script,” you will have to live in a character that may not be a true representation of your capabilities.

2. Stop giving Self Doubt Your Attention: Self doubt shapes our dysmorphic thoughts about our true value and potential. When you give value to doubt, it will paralyze your success.

3. Just Admit It: When you walk into a room of leaders, if you are nervous, just admit it. The credible admission of your own feelings allows others to understand your willingness to grow.

You do not need a script. You need to take a risk — Carol Sankar

To learn more about joining the Confidence Factor for Women in Leadership movement for exceptional leaders, visit

Carol Sankar is a business advisor for high level executives, service based visionaries and a leadership expert who is committed to assisting passionate, high-achieving leaders simplify their lives while increasing revenue by becoming productive, not working harder.Carol has been featured in Madame Noire, LearnVest, The Steve Harvey TV Show,, TEDx, Daily Worth, Entrepreneur Magazine and Essence Magazine

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