Thanksgiving without your Mom
Thanksgiving, a time for family, friends and food. A reason for the family to get together, even though I always wished it could happen more often. A time to celebrate each other’s company and be thankful for everything you have in your life. Every Thanksgiving it was always the same for me, “thank you God for blessing me with such wonderful family and friends.” This year however it was a bit different…
My first Thanksgiving without my Mom, she was always the first on my list to be thankful for. I was thankful for her humor, wisdom, grace, beauty, intelligence and strength, but most of all I was thankful she was here with me standing by my side. This year I am still thankful for her, but it runs deeper than that. I am thankful for her patience in dealing with me, her drive to always stay positive even when things were rough and courage in knowing to never give up no matter what. Also, I would like to add I’m thankful for her presence, because 27 years later the comfort in her smile and embrace was what got me through every day.
I’m thankful that even though it was short lived I got to spend every moment with her, thankful for the relationship we had that was much greater than any love I will ever know and I’m thankful that even though I can’t see her I know she is still by my side.
I’m thankful for my family that keeps giving 100% in making sure I am ok. I am thankful for my friends who constantly message me to check and put a smile on my face. I’m thankful for the strength God has given me to get through this holiday without seeing my Mom.
I’m thankful that I know thanks to God’s love I will see my Mom again and in that moment I will be truly whole again.
This holiday has taught me that I have always been thankful for the right things, but I never saw how deep those things went. By just saying family and friends you’re not really expressing how you truly feel. What about them makes you thankful? Well, I’ve learned that by losing someone you become more thankful than you’ve ever been. Yes, I lost my Mom, but I didn’t lose the memories. I’m thankful for the life I was given, the Mom who never gave up, the Grandpa who never got mad, the Aunt that showed compassion in my biggest time of need, the best friend who stood by my side through it all, the cousins who will lend a helping hand, the friends who checked to see how I was even after everything was said and done, the other family members who welcomed me with open arms and the God that promised me everlasting life with all these people someday.
Do not pity me, for I have more blessings than I can count. Do not pity my Mom for she lived above her standards as being the best Mother ever. Pity the ones that live without love, for love is the greatest gift of all and because of my Mom’s love I am able to share my love with the rest of the world.
I am thankful for everything in this messed up, wonderful, crazy, dangerous, hilarious, scary and beautiful life.