Film Review (kind of) for “Before I Wake”

In my quest to find a horror movie that I haven’t seen yet, I watched “Before I Wake” late last night. I’ve loved horror movies since I was 10, when I watched “Amityville Horror” for the first time. The real one, not the stupid remake. “Before I Wake” (2016, Intrepid Pictures) wasn’t awful. It did have some scary moments. But it’s stuck with me not because of the quality of the film, but because of the casting.

Holy cow, the casting! Kate Bosworth plays the mother. She’s been in a lot of stuff, but this is the first film I’ve seen her in although I’m familiar with her name. I don’t think I liked her. I wanted to. But she was so…plastic. It’s like she didn’t want to move properly because she didn’t want to mess up her hair. Which was really pretty but completely artificial in the way it never moved. It was weird and distracting.

The father, played by Thomas Jane, made me think of a skanky Thomas Haden Church. His hair was also distracting. It needed to be cut. Or at least washed.

The boy was fine, but he was a Haley Joel “Sixth Sense” knock off. I kept waiting for him to tell his foster parents that he sees dead people. Which in the movie he sort of does, but again, it was distracting.

So that’s my take on the movie. I realise I’ve offered no actual review and I haven’t discussed plot or writing, or even acting, at all. But this is what stuck with me, and as I told my friend Don earlier today, I bitch about TLT (Totally Legitimate Things™) all the time. Clearly, I was too distracted by other elements to focus properly.

So, the movie wasn’t horrible, but the search for a truly decent horror flick continues.