The Gambler’s Guide to the 2014 World Cup

A transatlantic planning session

Charles Finch
Apr 22, 2014 · 17 min read

Charlie

Don’t listen to Stephen Colbert. He works for CBS.

Rob

Not literally an owl, don’t be ridiculous.

Charlie

Adam Levine (l.) and Gerard Pique (r.) in happier times

Rob

Seems legit.

Charlie

Rob

Domenech was the original Anthony Davis.

Charlie

This is not classy at all, Brazil.

Rob

Jonny Evans does not have the answer you’re looking for, Mario.

Charlie

Rob

Neymar and Gisele hope that Rob is correct about Argentina’s WC prospects.

Charlie

Football saddo (subsp. Americana)

Rob

Charlie

Rob

Eden Hazard’s fashion role model is John Stockton.
Jogi Löw’s fashion role model is Jogi Löw.

Charlie

Rob

An invisible Nazgul lifting Arjen Robben off the pitch.

Charlie

Rob

Charlie

Cristiano wants Marcelo and Leo to stay professional until after the final whistle blows.

Rob

Charlie

Rob

File photo of Rob at an England match.

Charlie

No, really, competent.

Rob

A young Kyle Beckerman.

Charlie

I’m a bit of a computer nerd, so I can confirm this is photoshopped. Look at the pixels if you don’t believe me.

Rob

Charlie

Rob

Thomas Muller and his girlfriend went to Oktoberfest.

Charlie

This isn’t funny, come on, be serious please.
This man is a world-class athlete.

Rob

Wayne Rooney’s wife does not want him near this woman.

Charlie

Some of Zlatan’s goals have been masterpieces this season. (I’ll see myself out.)

Rob

Charlie

Unlike German teammate Thomas Muller, Mario Götze did not go to Oktoberfest, but things still worked out for him.

Rob

Andrea Pirlo with the swaggiest of all Panenkas.

Charlie

The water fountain is still in therapy.

Rob

Charlie

Rob

Please call us decrepit to our faces.

Charlie

Rob

Charlie

You, after betting on Edin Dzeko.

Rob

Charlie

The American in me.

Thanks to Anne Diebel.

    Charles Finch

    Written by

    I'm an Arsenal enthusiast and also a writer but mostly an Arsenal enthusiast.