How to Find an App Designer for that Gazillion Dollar Start-up that You’re Going to Form

· Look through your list of exes on OkCupid and invite them out for drinks to talk about start-ups. They probably won’t respond but at least you tried.

· Attend open house and happy hour at code academies. Talk to every single person you see. You might meet your co-founder.

· Call all of your friends, and friends of friends. Get recommendations, email addresses, and phone numbers. Prepare your wallet and your liver. You’re going to be taking them out for a lot of drinks.

· Linger outside of a high school. Talk to a kid from the robotics club and see if he or she will make you an app for $500 or a 5% equity in your soon start-up. Seriously, this is what my developer friend recommended. App developers are expensive. You gotta catch them young.

· Attend gaming conventions. Comic Con is a good one.

· Attend bitcoin events. This is kind of a throwback to 2012 & 2013. Do people still mine for bitcoins?

· Troll reddit, GitHub, Hacker News, and StackOverflow.

· Attend TechCrunch.

· Move to Silicon Valley. No water, no problem. You don’t need to shower. You need a programmer.

· Wait outside of Google?

· Go to Burning Man and hope that you’ll bump into Elon Musk.

· When all else fails, learn to code yourself. Pay $15,000 for a programming intensive at General Assembly, Fullstack Academy, and many more.