Roger, you’ve a really interesting view on this!
For me, it’s a part of being human to think negative thoughts. Sure, it’s doing ourselves an injustice, but a large part of it is beyond our control. I like to think of whether a person is kind or vice versa by their original intentions, not the effect they caused (though accidentally hurting someone sucks).
I think what’s important is to love ourselves, and be well-meaning. It’ll suffice for us to try our best to think on the brighter side of things.