A Plea for Nick Hart
by Tif Harrison
Last night, I pitched a play for TML where we use our advantage of having real audience members to collect physical money for our Crowdrise accounts. It was a gift to friend and collaborator, Nick Hart.
Nick has been having a rough time getting money. He’s begun placing bets with other company members and telling them that, if he wins, they have to donate to his Crowdrise.
Nick has raised $35.
The play is in the show this weekend and hopefully we will all walk away with a little heavier pockets. Below is a sneak preview of what is in store.
THE GREATEST PENNY WAR; the bloodsport of fundraising
written by Tif Harrison, 2016
Epic battle music at go. Light fades up
All neos in a clump in down spot. Everyone is wearing some makeshift battle attire. Music underscores.
ALL: AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
MW: Context! We are in the middle of our annual fundraiser!
ALL: AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
NH: This year, the company has decided to use a crowdsourcing platform called
ALL: CROWDRISE!
JK: It’s similar to all the others, except you can set personal goals and watch the progress of your fellow fundraisers.
MW: While some are succeeding, others are falling to the wayside.
NH: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHhhhhI’ve only raised $35.
JK: We hold weapons that others do not!
MW: MACHETES!
JK: No.
NH: LONG 2X4’s WITH NAILS IN THEM!
JK: No…
TH: GRIZZLY BEARS WITH TEETH MADE OF CHAINSAWS!
JK: What? Jesus, no. No. We have the audience!
MW: Fuck the internet! This is hand-to-hand fundraising, now!
NH: This is how we Crowdrise, mother fuckers.
JK: We are offering you the chance to sponsor one of us!
MW: We wear these cans, collecting as much from you as you are willing to give!
NH: Your real dollars will be turned into digital currency!
JK: Help us defeat all the others who were too busy to be in the show themselves!
TH: Checks can be made out to The Neo-Futurists!
Music bumps up
ALL: AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
Group runs into audience and starts collecting money.
CURTAIN
*Everyone wears a can around their neck for the rest of the show and the post-show. Money will be added to crowdrise pages daily/weekly with a note as to where it came from.
