Love Comes When You’re Not Looking.

I was a very socially awkward teenager, I spent most of my time in my room buried behind my computer screen (which I still do to this day). It wasn’t until later on in life I trained myself to talk to strangers. I’ll never forget the one night I decided head downtown by myself, with the purpose of striking up conversations with random people at bars. The goal was to talk to anybody about anything, whether it be about sports, current events, or the economy- if their mouths were moving and they were engaged with me I was happy.

Building on that confidence I signed up for every dating website you could think of — Plenty of Fish, eHarmony, OKCupid, etc, went to bars and clubs every weekend, and did my best to put myself out there. This journey taught me rejection wasn’t that bad, and the worst thing she could say was “no”.

Fast forward a couple of years, exhausted from the dating scene, I decided to give up on finding that significant other.

It was then that I got a text from an unknown phone number on a random weekday night, that number happened to be Rebeccas. Not knowing how she got the number, or how we even looked like — we texted each other for months, before finally meeting in person.

The term “Love comes when you’re not looking” held very true for the both of us. I’m not saying to wait for a random text from a stranger who will turn out to be your future wife.

But I don’t believe the term means you will find the right person when you stop searching, instead it means you shouldn’t focus your attention on finding others- and instead, you should focus on building yourself. So when you do run into your future significant other, he or she will feel you are the right person to join for the ride.

The funnier thing is we actually had met 2 years ago before the text messages, it just had been so long ago that we forgot about it. It all happened at a store when I randomly approached her for her number. I mustered up the courage after learning rejection wasn’t that bad, and the worst thing that could happen was she would say no.

Well, she did say no.. to my request for her number, and she took mine instead with no plans reach out to me. It wasn’t until 2 years later when she was single again, that she sent out that random text that put on us on the journey that lead us to this very moment.

“Love comes, when you’re not looking”

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