Resentment is cowardice.
Why it’s time to say what you need to say.
The look on his face said it all.
Stone cold from the back-seat, his answers were irritatingly short.
So I asked myself the usual questions. If I had done something stupid. Said something wrong. Made a mistake.
And then, it all just kinda hit me. So I leaned back, threw my head against the seat and thought about something else. If he wanted to tell what was up, he would’ve told me already.
After all, I’m not a f*cking mind reader.
You probably can sense when someone is mad.
When you know them well enough, their behaviors and actions can speak volumes. They ignore your texts. Or they look at you sideways when you apologize to them.
And sometimes we are these people too. We don’t actually want to communicate about anything, we just want to complain. Tell ourselves over and over the ways in which we have been mistreated by those around us, unconcerned that we might generally misunderstand the situation.
I recently had a big realization:
Until you hear both sides of anything, you’re losing.
You’re playing a guessing game.
Guessing their intentions. Them guessing yours.
It’s exhausting.
I often think about how the people I argue with on Twitter probably wouldn’t call or Skype with me to debate me, so why even bother getting upset at someone who has to hide behind a 180 character message?
The sort of modern way of dealing with things is to use your screen as a shield. It’s easier.
Confrontation just isn’t a natural way of being.
We’ve all felt the sigh of relief after we clear the air.
When we finally move on and stop bitching.
You’ve probably done this at least once in your life (I sure hope). Maybe it was in kindergarten when you pushed another kid down, realized you were a major jerk and apologized.
Or when your best friend betrayed you and you, finally, got so sick of it you confronted them about it. Only to walk away…
People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.
— Thich Nhat Hanh
Clear.
I don’t want resentful people in my life and I don’t harbor it any longer. If I’m frustrated, I either say something or move on.
The world doesn’t tell us we can do this. It encourages us to hold our anger in and lash out later on when we’ve finally gotten fed up.
You can let it go.
You’ve just got to be brave.
And brave, my friends, is probably gonna suck.
