The Genius Of Bobby “The Brain” Heenan
(Over the years, I’ve written a variety of articles that have not always seen the light of day. Editors leave sites, things fall through the cracks, etc. They just end up sitting on my desktop without a home. I decided to use Medium to give them a home, so they can at least see the light of day. Fair warning: These were initial drafts sent into editors in many instances, so they may not be meticulously pored over. They are good enough for me to want to publish them, but maybe aren’t perfect.)
For many years, I was a professional wrestling fan. For pockets of that time, which ran from when I was five until I was 20, I was a huge wrestling fan. Sometimes, I reflect upon the wrestling I watched and, perhaps unsurprisingly, a lot of what I once thought of fondly no longer does anything for me. Oftentimes, frankly, I can’t believe I ever enjoyed large swathes of what I was seeing. This period of time for wrestling happened to be an era of wrestling garbage men and wrestling pig farmers, which then gave way to an era where “humor” meant calling a man gay and calling a woman a slut. These were not good times.
By and large, the only positive feelings I have related to the wrestling I used to watch comes from ironic appreciation. You know, laughing at the dumb gimmicks and so forth. However, there are a handful of things, and a couple of people, that I do genuinely still have fondness for. Topping the list, is Bobby “The Brain” Heenan. In short, The Brain is the best.
The primary thing to say about Bobby Heenan is that he was funny. Truly, actually funny. Now, I am too young to really remember Heenan’s time as a manager, when he began to build the persona that became so iconic in the world of wrestling. I only have secondhand experience with this time of his career, although it was a very important time in the history of pro wrestling. Heenan remains the quintessential heel manager. I imagine, if you are reading an appreciation of Bobby Heenan, you are familiar with wrestling jargon. He was, after all, the self-styled “Brain.” He had a disdain for the rules, and a disdain for the fans, and the smarm with which he carried himself was perfect. He was the kind of manager that even fans who consider themselves above the dog-and-pony show of wrestling, fans that root for the performers they like as opposed to the designated good guys, would happily boo Heenan or call him a weasel. Why wouldn’t you? It gave the genius a chance to do his stuff.
It was Heenan’s work as a commentator that really sticks out to me most, though. It’s what I remember him from, and what still makes me laugh to this day. It’s what I go to YouTube to watch old videos of, particularly videos from the creative peak of Prime Time Wrestling. He really, in many ways, revolutionized the role of the heel commentator, or at least took it to its highest conceivable levels. Every heel to call a match after him is living in his shadow.
Heenan was so blustery, and so contemptuous of faces and the humanoids who rooted for them. The character was an idiot, in many ways, but it took a truly smart, sharp man to make his buffoonery funny. Did he make a lot of jokes that were racially insensitive, at best? Did he make disparaging comments about the appearance of women? Sure, you bet, but he was always doing it in the role of a heel. He was saying awful things because his character was supposed to be awful. His comments were setting up the face to chide him, and, usually, to give him his comeuppance.
Calling wrestling matches, particularly in the times when Heenan was at ringside, such as when he was with WCW, is a strange realm for one to work in. These commentators are speaking extemporaneously, only having certain pieces of information on what is going to unfold, if they have any. You have to think on your feet, not unlike improve, and Heenan’s greatest gift was his ability to think on his feet. It’s not like every quip was gold, but, to borrow an analogy from a more legitimate sport, there’s something impressive about hitting single after single in such a situation. He told actually good jokes in a world that, in truth, rarely featured actually funny people.
Heenan was also very good in other pieces that had a chance to be thought out and planned. This was more common in his days in WWF than in WCW, when he was on shows like the aforementioned Prime Time Wrestling. There, he got to work with his greatest comedic foil, Gorilla Monsoon, and their show was filled with what can only be called comedy sketches. Heenan would be a jerk, Monsoon would be affronted by it, and, in the end, Monsoon always won. Heenan knew the most important aspect of being a heel in wrestling; in the end, the face has to get the better of the heel, and Heenan was never funnier than when somebody was getting the better of him. Nobody got more apoplectic about being put upon than Heenan, and nobody was funnier in the world of pro wrestling. He could huff and puff, but in the end he’d be pulling Gorilla around in a rickshaw.
Once, I read an interview with the actor who played Jameson, a nerd character who appeared in WWF for a period of time. Yes, this is the kind of thing I do. Jameson was often a foil for Heenan, he appeared on Heenan’s short-lived talk show, usually to get insulted and put down. In the interview, Jameson spoke extensively about working with Heenan, and at one point he said this: “I know he could have been a great mainstream comic actor if he put the time and work into it, but he seemed happy enough staying in the wrestling world. By a wide margin, he is the best entertainer professional wrestling has ever had.”
I agree with this wholeheartedly. Bobby Heenan was not funny for a guy in wrestling. He was a funny, quick-witted man who could have worked in any comedy realm. He just chose pro wrestling as his milieu. This, in many ways, ghettoized him. Unless you watched wrestling in the ’80s or ’90s, you don’t know Bobby Heenan, and you probably don’t want to hear about how funny he was. It’s easy to dismiss somebody from the world of wrestling, especially in terms of their being “funny.” The Brain deserves better than that.
Because life is nothing if not an incredibly cruel joke, the man who made a living by being such a great talker has been battling throat cancer, and the complications thereof, for over a decade now. He’s disappeared from the world of wrestling, by and large, and that means he’s disappeared from the world in general. Pro wrestling loves trotting out its legends, but Heenan, unfortunately is not exactly trot-out-able in many respects. Fortunately, in these modern times, people don’t disappear completely. We can still appreciate the highlights from Heenan’s legendary career. Nobody ever did what he did better. I view my years as a wrestling fan with, at best, apathy. I still consider myself a big fan of Bobby “The Brain” Heenan. I think that really speaks to just how talented he was. Then again, what do I know? I’m just a humanoid.
