Why Women Should Choose Career Over Marriage — From a Man

My close female friends often ask me: why don’t you find a nice girl and settle down? After all, I am a prime candidate: 28 years old, working as a software engineer in a major metropolitan city in the U.S., no major debts, and reasonably attractive if previous dating success is of any reference. By all accounts I should be quite the catch.

But I have made the decision, mainly for political reasons, that I will never get married. The reason is simple: I believe the institution of marriage is oppressive to women, and only serves to perpetuate hetero-normative and stereotypical gender norms. I am acutely aware of my own privileged position in society and don’t want to contribute even more to the patriarchy by continuing to enforce sexist attitudes and norms.

In this modern day and age, women should have the freedom to experience growth, both professionally and spiritually, without being shackled to the mundane life of a housewife. This applies especially to women my age who I often see trying to get settle down and look for a serious relationship. I try to let these women know they do not need to conform to such a sexist institution, and actively tell them to consider alternatives.

After all, monogamy itself is so passé. I am currently in open relationships with 4 different women who value their own independence more than conforming to society’s demands. I consider this is to be the more feminist-friendly option. I also despise slut shaming and double standards, which is why whenever I meet a new woman I am quick to let her know that she is free to express her sexuality in a non-judgemental way.

Avoiding marriage also allows women to focus on what really matters: a successful and rewarding career. I am greatly supportive of ambition in a woman; as women get paid more and more, their economic empowerment enables them to contribute equally financially. Just last week I accidentally forgot to bring my wallet to a date; she happily covered it for the both of us. On other dates it is becoming increasingly common for both parties to “go Dutch”, where they each pay for 50% of the meal. Whereas fifty years ago I, as a man, would be expected to foot the entire bill, It is good to know that in this day and age both men and women can share the burden equally.

We should therefore celebrate the massive strides that feminism has made, and continues to make everyday. Modern women should get with the times and boycott marriage. Instead of being housewives, they should embrace the joy of true equality in the form of a rewarding career and the freedom to express their sexuality without judgment from society.