As you can see, I am no artist with paper and colors. I think a name, I draw a shape, I write your names, all the names of those I love. I color. I write wishes around the shapes that hold the names, wishes and hopes for what they need, what they say they need, what I think they need.
Wishes. Prayers. I add to this funky work when I find a new name or determine a new wish. Sometimes I just add a word wish, sometimes colors. Sometimes a new name in a shape.
I keep it by the window so it can float out and up, so the birds can fly it to freedom, the angels carry it to God, my God the artist who creates through love, only love, the most creative force. That god that decides hurt boys are to blame, who hates gays and anyone different, who forgets the poor, sick, lonely: not that fake god made up by man.
My God is mystery and love and light and healing. You don’t have to believe. I only hope you believe that my funny art is a wish for all these good things in your lives: creation, mystery, love, light, healing.
I usually start a new “portrait” of names around the 1st of the month. I will start a new one today, the 17th. The lines bother me. I’ll use printer paper. And make two pages. One for Smash Street. One for everyone else. I find more names to add to Smash Street and words of wishes to add for the birds and angels and the wind to carry from me to you. The dogs are there, the heelers, Jacks and Colette. The vegetables. The bear. The snow.
I was embarrassed to send you the art until I realized how lucky I am to have so many to send good thoughts. I am lucky to watch empathy grow, feelings spill, confrontations challenge, anger directed healthfully, life lived honestly and truest love.
My sad art is, for now, lacking some names but is evidence that every day I am sending what I can which may not be much but it is what I have to send. Brave man and boys creating new life. Phoenixes rising.
Encouragement and love is what I send.
I send them in awe. And I honor you all.
If I was a real artist, I’d draw something heroic to represent what you all do every moment, fighting real life demons which are more evil and stronger than fairy tale dragons. Fighting stories learned, facing truths.
Then, again, what could be more heroic than your names?
Not much, if anything.