Day 5: Exhaustion
Four days with about… 15 hours of sleep
Last fall I was living a life much like what I’ve had these past four days. Less than five ours of sleep each night, too much partying and not enough studying. It’s a messed up ranking of priorities, and overall it’s leaving me a little messed up in the head. Drinking and going out doesn’t really mess with me, but with a lack of sleep I lose my head, and with that I lose my spine. I lose all sense of reality, I get extremely paranoid and have absolutely no confidence. If I’m not decently rested my ability to make simple conversation essentially disappears and I retreat into my own head and lock myself there. I don’t talk to other people, I don’t get much done, and I go back and forth between wanting to nap and having anxiety attacks. This was my fall, and it was terrible. I’m not talking poor rest, I mean little to no resting. For example- this weekend. Every night I got… maybe three or four hours of sleep, but it wasn’t good rest and it left me feeling dazed and distant from the world every morning, until I found coffee or began partying again.
It’s a really dangerous slope, but the key thing is that I need a good amount of rest and without it I turn myself into a self-conscious, rambling mess of a man. Tonight I will get at least six hours of rest, which will be great but it won’t do much for my sleep debt. It will take me at least a few days to get back on a good mental level.
Lesson being: I need to stay on track in terms of rest, because without it the ship sinks.
I’m going to recover from this in a few days time, I’m sure, but I’ve still yet to conquer my issue with getting a daily workout in. I keep finding reasons to not get to the gym, which is annoying because less than a month ago I was running every day. I just have to get back into the habit, and not let go of it.
This week will be tough with an immense amount of shifts at my job, as well as a bunch of social events going around at my fraternity. I have a few term papers coming up that I am not fully up to date with in terms of finishing on time.
Tomorrow is a new day, and hopefully a rested day. For now, I need rest!