Scary NFL Scenarios

It’s Halloween week and the creepy crawly stuff is peaking out of every corner and shadow. Stranger Things came out just a few days ago, and since I’m sure you’re already done binging this season I thought I would give you something else to keep you on edge.

This week I am going to give you the NFL divisional standing so far (Not scary). For each team I am going to give a short scenario, question, or synopsis that could plague the team this season or in upcoming seasons (Very scary!). Some of them will be simply concerning, some of them will be worst case scenarios, and some will just make you shake a little. Read on… if you dare!

AFC NORTH:

Steelers (6–2): Three words: Big Ben retires. Two words: Josh Dobbs. One word: Yikes.

Ravens (4–4): Joe Flacco has more interceptions than touchdowns on the season and he’s making $20.6 million this year. They have no big time receivers. They are old at key positions.

Bengals (3–4): Andy Dalton will never win a Super bowl. They lost all their elite coordinators (Mike Zimmer and Hue Jackson) and have seen significant decline since.

Browns (0–8): Still the Browns, still ruining quarterback’s careers.

AFC SOUTH:

Titans (4–3): The offensive scheme, “exotic smash-mouth”, doesn’t work. The head coach, Mike Mularkey, doesn’t maximize the team’s potential, but middling success will save his job and stall the team’s growth.

Jaguars (4–3): Bortles holds the team back, and their number one receiver suffered a significant injury. The Bortles situation should be fixable in the draft, or free agency. The organization needs Coughlin and he’s 71 already.

Texans (3–4): The best player in franchise history may never be the same.

Colts (2–6): They’re ruining Andrew Luck! That coaching staff… Woof.

AFC EAST:

Patriots (6–2): Quarterback is 40 and has no backup at all because you just traded him to the 49ers. Also, Belichick is 65 and has to retire at some point- probably the same year as Brady.

Bills (5–2): Tyrod is not built for the playoffs, and Zay Jones is a nightmare so far.

Dolphins (4–3): Adam Gase seems over his head, more of an offensive coordinator. All three quarterbacks are underwhelming, and that’s being nice.

Jets (3–5): Ownership will almost definitely ruin all hopes of rebuilding by firing Todd Bowles at some point. They still have spots they have to draft well, not something they do often.

AFC WEST:

Chiefs (6–2): Offense relies too heavily on Andy Reid’s schemes. Defensive front is aging.

Broncos (3–4): No competent quarterback. Offensive line needs work. Differing ages on offense and defense means they could miss their window of opportunity to build a complete team.

Chargers (3–5): Could find themselves in need of quarterback sooner rather than later. The whole franchise is in transition, and not getting much support.

Raiders (3–5): The defensive- leaning coaching staff is holding back the offense and not getting results from the defense… Good mix.

NFC NORTH:

Vikings (6–2): Can’t keep a quarterback, not named Case Keenum, healthy. Need to get the offense in order soon to match defensive primes.

Packers (4–3): COLLARBONE!

Lions (3–4): One dimensional offense, and weak in the secondary. Wasting Stafford’s prime years.

Bears (3–5): Trubisky came in compared to Stafford, more Flacco. He needs a really solid team around him, can’t carry an average roster.

NFC SOUTH:

Saints (5–2): Drew Brees is in the twilight of his career.

Panthers (5–3): The Christian McCaffrey and Cam Newton experiment isn’t mixing the way the coaching staff was expecting. Team is inconsistent, and relying on older players too heavily. The best linebacker in the league has concussion issues (this one makes me shiver).

Falcons (4–3): No Kyle Shanahan, no elite Matt Ryan.

Buccaneers (2–5): Jameis is feeling the weight of the world. The defense needs a good amount of work.

NFC EAST:

Eagles (7–1): Just lost an elite left tackle that was already aging. The roster isn’t top 10 in the league.

Cowboys (4–3): Zeke’s out…again. Aging and/or unreliable outside threats. If head coach isn’t disciplined, team isn’t disciplined.

Redskins (3–4): Hate Kirk “Kurt” Cousins for some reason no one can figure out. Not a step-up franchise.

Giants (1–6): McAdoo doesn’t have a head coach’s disposition. Offensive line is gross. Wide Receivers don’t win championships. Eli is getting older. Locker room precedent that has been set isn’t a successful one.

NFC WEST:

Seahawks (5–2): Speaking of bad offensive lines… this one is, and they could get Wilson hurt, like last year. Defense is getting older, and team’s window is closing.

Rams (5–2): The roster isn’t good enough to win a Super bowl yet. Opposing defensive coordinators will have the off season to look at Rams offense, year two could be more difficult.

Cardinals (3–4): Palmer is done, nothing behind him. Hall of Fame receiver can only beat Father Time for so long, and other receivers aren’t special. Offensive line isn’t elite.

49ers (0–8): Long road ahead of them. Next draft will tell a lot about the ability of Shanahan and Lynch. No explosive threats on offense. Still have Jed York as CEO.

So there you have it! Anywhere from your team’s nightmare scenarios to just mild concerns. The possible situations that could derail the hopes and dreams of your team. But I guess you’ll just have to keep an eye out for them in week 9… *Scary laugh… Like in Thriller!

Happy Halloween! Stay safe.