How to Deserve a Content Marketing Middle Finger, Vol. 1

  • Stay in the middle of the road.
  • Appeal to the lowest common denominator.
  • Comment on something that more than 50 people also commented on.
  • Praise something because many others did. Be an ass-kissing sheep.
  • Force the weakest connection of a trending topic to your product/service.
  • State a watery inspirational quote.
  • Post something that gives anyone the most remote chance of getting a job.
  • Rehash an opinion about millennials.
  • Sound so self-importantly formal as if your trivial company is curing cancer.
  • Fake a humorous, hipstery tone.
  • Tone everything down to avoid offending anyone at all costs.
  • Forget simple reason and go with the tide of opinion. Apply no independent thought.