Car dealership flags are out of control

Where do they get these things and why are they so big? The American flag in front of the White House would get laughed at in comparison. At this point, it’s pretty clear that all car companies and all car dealerships absolutely love America.

The beautiful thing is seventy-five percent of these companies aren’t even close to American. So why does Suzuki throw up the red, white, and blue in front of their store? There’s a very slim chance a Suzuki dealership still exists, but we get it, you’re proud to be an Asian American selling Asian cars in America.

Asian dealerships have the biggest flags, and Toyota is always king of the castle. We appreciate the foreign patriotism, but planting an oversized American flag on the front lawn is like ordering a soft serve ice cream cone in the dead of winter. It’s extraordinarily asinine.

This blog series is the work of Dan Witte and Dave Marquardt, the creators of the greatest party game in the world, CoolCats & AssHats. If you’d like to own it, click here. Dan did most of the writing; Dave is good at Internet.

We appreciate you for reading. Please show us your appreciation by clicking the green heart at the bottom of the page so it isn’t empty like your/our souls.