Derek (Clooney) Jeter Does the Unthinkable, Gets Married

YEAH JETES YEAH JETES YEAH JETES YEAH JETES YEAH JETES

What a time for marriage. First, Russell Wilson lands Ciara, which is more bananas than people think. And now the George Clooney of sports settles down? Oh my.

It’s been a hell of a run for Jeter. Minka Kelly, Jessica Alba, Adriana Lima, Scarlett Johansson, prime Mariah Carey, and so many more that would take an entire library to chronicle. For so long, he was the bachelor of bachelors in pro sports. Thought to be one of the classier gentlemen, with ultimate charisma and game.

People Magazine reported this weekend that now, there’s just one: Hannah Davis, who Jeter’s been dating the last 4 years (when Jeter was 38 and she was 22, let’s not ask too many questions). If you’re not familiar with Hannah’s work, let me not bore you with my description of who she is, and let her just show you:

And of course, there’s the DirectTV commercials she did:

Shoutout to you, #2.

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