“if only” comes to mind because it’s not human nature to be “all in” all the time. And then there are these questions: 1. can your partner appreciate and understand your behavior as “all in”? 2. Does your “all in” meet with their expectation of what “all in” means? 3. Does the expectation of your partner being “all in” create an unrealistic level of expectation? 4. Can you be “all in” when you are having a bad day? 5. is “all in” really really boring (kind of like “too nice”?
Correct Answers: 1- NO, 2-No, 3- NO 4-NO 5-YES
Since the parties in a relationship are both individuals, they will view, assess, appreciate, experience the world and their relationships from their own individual perspectives and experiences. As such, everyone has their own vision of what “all in” means which will never line up with the vision of the individual they are in a relationship with: what happens when each person’s view of “all in” means the other should take out the trash?