How to get your shit together…

As I was just laying here in my bed thinking about this very thing, I thought to myself “you need to get back to the YOU that you once were.” Then I had a revelation that I don’t want to get back to the me I once was, I want to meet the me that I am becoming, with my shit together, and a total understanding of my directional differences.

Why would I want to regress when I am progressing? I don’t. And no one else should either. The me that I once was is someone I don’t even know, now. And honestly I don’t care to know her any longer. I want to keep some of her traits, feelings and memories, but I want to be better than she was. And I plan on continuing to do just that.

I’m reinventing myself as I have been for a few months now, and where I am heading and what I am doing with my life is making me happy. It’s taken much longer than what I hoped for, but understand that I am suffering from perfectionist syndrome, the WORST syndrome to suffer from.

I need to give myself credit for where I have been and what I have been through, take away from that the wisdom and knowledge that I have gained, and the massive amounts of creativity that the horror has brought me. And I feel like everyone else could do with following a similar pathway.

Life up until the past year was like walking on hot coals and broken shards of hot glass. I’ve learned a lot. I want to take that learning and mold it into this better, stronger, more tenacious version of who I am right now. Forget the girl above, sitting in the corner sulking and thinking, and not doing anything about her thoughts and ideas.

I just needed the right mindset and I have it. Bedtime revelations are the best, and can really get you in touch with what needs to happen, no matter your situation. I will not regress into who I once was, no. I will continue to build a strong Viking-like person who will take on the world with her creativity and knowledge, and her desire to learn and grow even more.

Thanks for reading my randomness. Thoughts before bed, are the most prolific sometimes.