How to be alive without dying while trying?
I spend my days listening to music, making music. Listening to the music of the rain, of the sunlight that reflects on the world around me. Listening and talking to the people that surround me, writing down my ideas, my fears, the restlessness that keeps me awake, which I take with me to sleep. Filling pages on top of pages of words that pulse from the insides of my brain, through my fingers, to the keys. Reading science fiction and daydreaming about the future. About technology, with the sciences as a religion. Immersing myself inside videogames, and other new, digital forms of experiencing. Feeling art around me, and trying to express it, learning to resignify it with new words, new sounds, new images, new ways to use the body and to dance, that come out of me, ever more complex, immerse in their own evolutionary vortex.
Learning. Learning. Learning even more. Learning what it means to be alive, to be human, to perceive, to feel, to share, to live.
And questioning myself. Asking myself, above all, how to live like this indefinitely? How can I live off this that’s so good. How can I distance myself from the preoccupations that have been imposed on me? That are not me, mine?
Money, social life, progress, the breakneck speed at which the world moves.
How can I stop time? How to be, and live, eternally, in the way that I want to be, in the way I want to live?
How can I stay here, with no urge to leave? How to settle the eagerness, the urge to explore further beyond, to go in stronger, to fall deeper, to rise and reach higher layers?
How to be alive without dying while trying?