Onion skin.

More thoughts on fear.

We have to peel back the layers of the onion and face our fears. But first, we need to question fear. 

As I sit in a non-descript coffee chain, listening to the noise of people over whirring machines, I’m pondering my recent post on “Fear of Failure” and am wondering where I go next. How do I get past this feeling and move on? The answer isn’t easy. I have to continue stripping away layers, starting with questioning fear.

There have been so many kind comments from the Medium community. People I don’t know, yet we are united by this vast interconnected tube of data. I’d love nothing more than to get them in a room and talk. A focus group, if you will, on fear.

The questions are simple, yet run achingly deep, for those who’ve responded:

  1. Do they see themselves?
  2. Do they see others?
  3. Did they have an emotional response when reading?
  4. Did they feel their response was positive or negative?

I’ve always been told if you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear. People react so strongly to fear, but I sit here and wonder: Why do we hide our fear?

  1. Is from shame?
  2. Are they putting on the proverbial brave face?
  3. Are they “taking one for the team?”
  4. Does fear rule them?
  5. Does fear frighten them?
  6. Do they want to rid themselves of fear?
  7. Are they consumed with fear to the point they can’t function?
  8. Are they afraid to face their fear and strip the layers away?

If we all know fear is a conscious choice, then why does it have such an iron grip on so many? Therein lies a great conundrum.

Failure is a state of mind. One that controls even the most brilliant, holding them back from reaching their full potential. It causes distraction and prevents us from realizing our own self-worth. Supposedly, we get more from our life’s failures than successes. But is this true when you’re not putting anything out for judgment by the masses so you can fail? Can we get the same thing from a strictly fear based failure? No, we cannot. Because we’ve not failed unless we’ve actually completed something.

We have to take a step back and compartmentalize. Then ever so slowly, we start peeling away the thin, skin-like, layers of the onion. One at a time.