Ramblings: On growth and changing perspectives
I recently changed job. This rather important event made me see things I wouldn’t typically pay attention to. Doing so inspired me to push my limits further in hopes of growing as a sound designer as well as a colleague. This obviously led to personal growth, especially in regards to this ever-looming ghost of self-doubt, but I have not yet fully untangled this impact so I won’t talk about it too much here. Been a while since I haven’t blogged, so let the ramblings begin!
Self-imposed change is confusing. Sure, it’s easy to set goals and ambitions. The tricky part is the journey there. Right after shipping my latest project, Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy at Eidos-Montreal, I knew this was the moment to shed my old skin and get proactive with my list of aspirations. I decided to first get started by revisiting my workflow. So I jumped onto the cool-kids-bandwagon/cult and changed my main DAW (software used to create/edit sounds) from Nuendo to Reaper. This was purely self-imposed and done without and sort of frame/structure, thus it didn’t take long for motivation to run out. In search of a new incentive to get more comfortable with Reaper, I pitched the idea of a weekly sound jam to my colleagues and they thankfully were interested to participate.
First week was awesome! The different workflow inspired me to create within new limitations. These were mostly due to technical shortcomings of my Reaper knowledge, but also because I decided to use plugins (extensions of the DAW used to affect/generate sounds) that I wasn’t familiar with. By the end of week two, I was already setting new comfort zones and I was already using these new tools in familiar fashions. Every passing weeks, I grew more and more comfortable, thus losing the focus of what I wanted to get out of these weekly projects. The social and team-building aspect of these can’t be understated! At least that part remained awesome until the end!
Not too long after this, I left Eidos-Montreal and joined Twin Suns Corp. This was huge for me, as I had spent the last 7 years and 8 months working there. Not only that, but I was joining a new team where I didn’t know anyone besides who I had met during the interview process. Thankfully, everyone at TSC are beyond amazing and they’re truly a treat to work with so it didn’t take long for me to feel like a part of the team. Joining a new workplace meant that there was an opportunity for growth. So much change, so many areas to redefine my technical, creative and interpersonal skills!
Once I settled in and got comfortable with my new role, I thought that this was it. I had pushed my limitations further away by being bold and attempting new things with new folks. I had redefined the work-me. More confident in my expertise, change on the macro level felt real! It didn’t take too long for me to realize that on the micro level however, things didn’t change much. I was still using the same plugins when crafting sounds in the same ways I had been for the past few years, and that bugged me as I felt that my biggest weakness was right there.
Any creative discipline are a balancing act between raw artistry and technical know-how. On this spectrum, I had always seen myself somewhat near the center, leaning slightly more towards the technical side of things. As growth occurs, the width of occupation on this spectrum grows from both sides. For me, it felt as if I had focused a tad too much on the technical side and left the artistry in a coma. As soon as I realized this, it became clear that the time had arrived. I had to find a way to expand my creative muscles.
I had identified my biggest blindspot as a sound designer. I rarely created sounds from the ground up. Instead, I focused on either editing/layering library sounds until getting the desired results, or simply recording the sounds I needed. I wanted more, as some stuff I wanted to create felt unreachable. Enter the wonderful world of synthesis. I did my research and found a synth that catered to my needs (Mavis by Moog for those curious). Got my hands on it and then a new world opened up. I started to make sounds I couldn’t before, but sadly I was still editing them with the same plugins in the same ways once again. Another roadblock.
Toying around with my new synth had me dreaming about returning to the world of songwriting/musical production. And this is where things clicked. Changing job had given me room to grow and pushed me to reach my growth goals on a macro level, but using the sound designing tools at my disposal in a different context was where I could get this burst of creative energy and micro-level growth. And so began this wonderful experience. I started to put down some musical bits and ideas into my DAW and loved it even though things went nowhere real fast. I have zero musical theory knowledge and don’t have much time to spend doodling ideas. So yeah. About a month of doing music in my very limited spare time, I finally got somewhere I feel comfortable and proud. I don’t see my compressors like I did before, same goes for most other plugins I use on a daily basis. Things didn’t change all that much, but that slight change of perspective in regards to my sound designing tools truly renewed my approach to them.
This has been going on for a while eh? Sorry, the past few months really were gigantic for me. In order to fully embrace this renewed energy and in hopes of keeping that momentum going strong, I decided to continue this musical venture. It’s not my main focus, but I’ve discovered something soothing and creatively inspiring through it. And since this isn’t my job or anything, there’s no real pressure to come up with something amazing or anything really. I do it for fun and for expanding my creative bounds as far as I can take them.
Until next time!
