Well framed article … societal training is just that … training. After so many years, it becomes invisible … but that does not mean that it does not exist.
I went car shopping with a girlfriend … she was buying a new car. She makes twice as much money, is exceptionally well spoken and knows her sh*t. Still, I was the audience for the salesman … Lexus, no less. By reputation, the best trained in the business.
Every time he addressed me, I averted my eyes to my girlfriend … obviously deferring. He would not be redirected subtlety. We promptly left and she went alone to buy a different make.
It wasn’t about the car … it is truly and exclusively about dignity.
Well done in pointing out the assumption behind the “kindness.”
Not every kind act is right … sometimes it is naively demeaning.