Dave Colon – Medium

Dave Colon

Adams Administration Hires McKinsey For Get You A Date Study

Calling his predecessor’s work on the issue “disgraceful” and “behind the times” Mayor Eric Adams today announced that New York City has…

4 min readOct 13, 2022

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Dave Colon

Deblazymandias

I met a traveler from old New York, Who said — “Two vast and trunkless legs of stone Stand in Grand Army Plaza…Near them, in Prospect…

1 min readDec 21, 2021

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Deblazymandias

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Dave Colon

Mayor de Blasio Announces Panel of Your Crushes to Evaluate How To Get You A Date

NEW YORK — Mayor Bill de Blasio today announced a new expert panel to figure out what you need to do in life to get a date

6 min readApr 5, 2019

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Dave Colon

LOL, this idiot thought every day in April was April Fool’s Day

3 min readMay 5, 2016

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LOL, this idiot thought every day in April was April Fool’s Day

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Dave Colon

Every Broadway pun the Mets’ play-by-play booth unleashed on Giants’ pitcherMike Broadway as the…

This past weekend, the Mets set a franchise record by scoring 12 runs in a single inning in a game against the San Francisco Giants. Gone…

2 min readMay 3, 2016

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Every Broadway pun the Mets’ play-by-play booth unleashed on Giants’ pitcherMike Broadway as the…

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Dave Colon

Letter of Condemnation: That Fucking Louis CK/Trump Thing

This past weekend was a banner weekend for comedians with bad Donald Trump takes. For starters, you had Saturday Night Live’s “Racists For…

5 min readMar 8, 2016

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Letter of Condemnation: That Fucking Louis CK/Trump Thing

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Dave Colon

Awl 3.0 Tweets, ranked

1 min readFeb 24, 2016

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Awl 3.0 Tweets, ranked

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Dave Colon

Dave Colon

Freelance for hire, Fake Dean of American Letters, only living human to have had a pitch rejected by Thought Catalog, voice of the Pepsi Generation.

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