I’m originally from England (dual citizen) and I remember how appalling racism in that country was back in the seventies. I recall signs in pubs that read, “No blacks, no dogs, no Irish,” and it made my stomach churn (and not because I’m part Irish, although that didn’t help). Not really sure why I’ve always had such a visceral response to racism, but when I was about four, my first girlfriend was black. Okay, “girlfriend” is kinda stretching things (we held hands on a dance floor at a wedding and looked at each other), but I never forgot her. Then when I was a little older, someone gave me a copy of the book Black Like Me, which I now see as fairly dodgy and clumsy in many ways (a white guy literally doing black face), but it had a profound effect on how I looked at race. Injustice of all kinds has bothered me, and the American experience especially has always sung to me (mostly laments): the Dust Bowl and the events Steinbeck brought home to everyone who read it in The Grapes of Wrath. And To Kill a Mockingbird, too, of course. Now I recognize that these books were all filtered through white eyes, but at least they woke me up somewhat, and from an early age. It’s why I believe education (a simple thing like reading) is also a huge key to healing all this trauma.
Yes, so many white people are indeed touchy about it. I guess it’s like they feel they will be judged as evil to the bone or something, rather than admit they might have said or done something racist once. Someone who does a racist thing isn’t necessarily bad or evil if they can sincerely grieve and apologise for their actions or words. I’ve been touchy when I was called on my privilege that made me blind to something. My knee jerk response was to deny it. But only when I truly let that go and listened did I see it.
But we also pay a price when we speak up. Even in families where racism isn’t ostensibly a big thing. I’ve been shut down for balking at a family member’s constant stream of racist jokes, judged as humourless and overly solemn. “Lighten up,” right? Interesting phrase in this context! It’s subtle, but we can become emotionally ostracized by our own families if we’re too vehement on this subject. Made to feel different and apart. Which again is like a kind of mini racism in itself. Not saying it’s equivalent in pain or scope, of course, but see how many ways this kind of bigotry and prejudice engineers all of us, shapes our behaviour?
And I believe you’re right in another way: change is coming one way or another. For our children’s sakes and our children’s children, it’s better to be on the right side of history far as I’m concerned, even if our side loses. (For what it’s worth, I don’t think it will.)
