Running out of Breath when Speaking in Public
How can you prevent it?
This is still one of the weirdest things that happen to me occasionally. Breathing. Shouldn't it be the most natural thing for us? Something we don't need to think about, something that's intuitive and without making much effort? Apparently not.
Usually, when I start to speak publicly, I soon begin to feel like running the miles without a proper break or like I just turned into Darth Vader. The breathing gets harder and harder and I have to make short pauses for taking a deeper breath. For a long time, I blamed my body for it, because I do have big adenoids which complicate my breathing in general, but no. This is mostly a head problem.
Troubles with breathing happen to me on various occasions - while having a presentation at work, while presenting new ideas to a group of people, while speaking on Zoom, or even while having a phone call with someone I often don't talk to. I don't need to be a genius to realize that this has something to do with stress. Of course, it does. But I don't want to sound nervous! I am prepared and confident about the work I have done, there is usually no reason for me to get stressed about it. Yet the stress still attacks me.
I tried to look it up and I found out, it's not that unusual. Many people share the same experience and it drives them crazy too. And it doesn't matter who you speak to. Either it's a group of unknown people, or people you don't know very well yet (like new clients), or friendly colleagues who are kind and supportive.
“Being assaulted by fear and performance anxiety is something that happens when we step into the spotlight and feel the pressure of those eyeballs on us,” said a public speaking coach, Eleni Kelakos.
According to Eleni, running out of breath while presenting to a group is a surefire sign of stage fright.
Yes. I do get nervous when all the attention is on me at first. With time and longer talking it gets better during the same presentation. Usually, once my breathing gets slower. However, those first 2 minutes (or so) are a big struggle that makes me feel like a failure.
There is also a technical explanation for this shortness of breath: we just wanna run away from the situation. Every time you speak in public and you feel hungry for air, it's because your own body wants to flee. It's a typical fight-or-flight response. Your body wants to protect you from a situation that your mind is obviously not comfortable with. The body gets ready for running away by getting more oxygen to your muscles. Your heart rate increases, causing you to breathe with more difficulty, and, all of a sudden, you are ready for a fight. Or flight. Or become Darth Vader's twin.
But on the other hand, it's pretty cool, because that means your body is ready to save your life! However, not so cool when you really need to stay calm so others wouldn't be worried about your life. Seriously. I mean, it would really come in handy if you meet true danger in the woods… But a short work presentation? Come on, body, just calm down, there are no sharp teeth there. Usually. Depends on co-workers.
So what can you do with your overly protecting body?
I was searching for answers through the internet and tried some of the most promising ones. And they seem to be helping a lot, although you will still need a lot of practice to get better at it. Here they come:
- Slow down. I realized that when I'm under stress, I tend to speak too fast. My head thinks that if I say things quickly, I will sound more confident, or more interesting. Or that I will trick my mind to focus on so many words that I won’t have time to think about how nervous I am. Well, apparently, that's all wrong.
Starting to speak slowlier and calmer will help you with your breathing problems. Your body won't feel like it's under attack and there will be enough breaks for taking a good steady breath.
The only problem is that when nervous, the slow becomes much slower. It's not, but you feel like one word is taking you for ages and one pause will cause human extinction. The professionals advise you to record yourself in advance. You will usually find out that your taking-forever-talking is a completely normal one. - Think about the purpose of this talk. Don't focus on the way you look or the way you sound. In the end, that is not the most important thing. More important is the message behind your talking. Are you presenting some work you finished? What is the main goal for it?
Do try to personalize the people who are listening to you. What are their needs? Why are they listening to you? What is the most important thing for them during this presentation or talk? The sooner you realize that the focus is not on your performance or how nervous you may sound, the faster you calm yourself.
Also, remember that people are in many stuff the same or at least similar. They probably have problems speaking in public on their own, even if they might hide it better. Or maybe they are just used to it due to a lot of practice, but they were once in your shoes, too. - Honesty is the key. Before a presentation or a difficult discussion, you may just come forward with your stage fright. Sometimes, the best practice is to be honest about how you feel. Others might join you, or you will get tons of support, and who knows, maybe in the end, even a compliment for how well you handled it.
Usually in my experience, if you come clean, the atmosphere somehow gets less tense. And even if you struggle, it's not taken so harshly. Even by yourself. And let's face it, you are your worst critic, so… what a success! - Get out of your comfort zone! This is the funniest tip of them all. It's something like shock therapy for your brain. You know that having a presentation is really stressful for you. So how to overcome it? How about doing something even more stressful before it?
Yes. Let's say you have this big company meeting in the afternoon and you have a speech coming. So do something crazy before the meeting! Like screaming something aloud in public or dancing funnily at a restaurant. Something truly out of your comfort zone. And now, when you have your awkward moment behind you, nothing can stop you in a few hours. Just remember that moment before your speech. :)
In conclusion…
I hope these tips help you to become much more confident with your public speaking. Remember that you are a great and unique person and every struggle is making you more human. And there are more of us who go through the same difficulties, so you are definitely not alone. Congrats to you for trying to solve your issues! You are a true inspiration to us all!
Be free to share some experiences in the comments.
Hey! I’m Moni.
Thanks very much for reading, I hope you learned something useful today! Did you like my content? Follow me to get to more of it. :))
