The Chemical Imbalance

A 3rd party story where Amy and Martin are both working professionals set up on a blind date by their beloved friend Melissa. Here’s how the evening went..

Amy:

“Damn you, Melissa! Why did you have to choose today of all?” I hissed as I put on the final touches to my make-up. Given it is a blind date, but still one should always dress to impress. Melissa’s records show that she has seldom been successful at hooking up people and today I have to become one of her experiments.

Martin:

I hope I am looking good, was one of the main concerns running through my head as I made my way through the crowded Kent Street. I work in IT in a major company, so not being good with girls is something that you must have guessed. If this works out well, I owe Melissa big time. Oh my God! that’s her! WOW! It can’t be, how can she be so beautiful. What was Melissa thinking setting me up with such a diva.

Amy:

Oh damn, just what I needed. Nerdy looking, unmaintained body. I hate you, Melissa. Well, at least he looks decent. “Hi, I am Amy”.

“Hi Amy, sorry to keep you waiting, my boss just wouldn’t let me leave”

Perfect, that means he came without even bothering to shower. I hope he doesn’t smell.

Martin:

So far so good, Melissa chose the perfect restaurant for this! A nice corner table. Today might just be my lucky day. I should probably stop staring at her, but damn she look so perfect. She keeps moving around uneasily, maybe I should offer to exchange seats, probably something in her cushion.

Amy:

This guy is unbelievable. He keeps staring. I caught him twice now, but he just doesn’t understand. Is it my dress? I should probably adjust it. Men are such creeps. Get the food someone!

Martin:

Calm down Martin, remember the things we finalized that we would say, go ahead, they were funny. Melissa mentioned she likes adventure sports. Tell her about the time you went trekking. Stop sweating you fool. She’s being so patient with you. Maybe she does like you. Say something clever, she’s probably had all kind of guys hitting on her, be different.

Amy:

It’s like he’s solving a sum in his head. What are you thinking freak? I can’t keep taking the initiative now can I? Does he think I am not good enough for him? How dare he!

Martin:

The fact that she’s taking so much interest in your life probably means she’s into you. Nice one dude! Way to go! Shit, she’s got some food stuck on the edge of her upper lip. How do I tell her? It will be offensive. Maybe if I wipe my mouth, she’ll probably get the idea.

Amy:

What a total creep. Why is looking at my mouth and licking his lips? What a pervert. I would have slapped him had he not been Melissa’s friend. How could she do this to me? Such a creep! Order for the cheque, please!

Martin:

She doesn’t want dessert, does this mean what I think it means? Wow, have I become so desirable all of a sudden? Who cares, get the cheque you blithering idiots!

Amy:

He seems more eager than me to end the date, gosh, was I so bad? What did I do wrong? Do I not look okay? Is he meeting someone else? He mentioned that Susan girl much more than usual.Did she just text him? is she better looking than I am? How could he be so mean to me? Melissa you and I going to have a brawl.

Martin:

Wow! Manchester United won! Yippee! Perfect result and the perfect date.

Amy:

“Thanks for the lovely evening Martin, had a great time.” And that’s for your Susan you creep! I hope that slamming door hit him on the face.

Martin:

What the hell happened? Was she a Liverpool fan? What else could have caused this?

The end.