#365DaysOfWriting Day 90: Clean Up

Every three months, I engage in a ritual of cleaning up my Facebook Friend List. People I have not been in touch with for quite a while, or people I just don’t feel the need to stay in contact with, I delete them from my list. Sometimes, a few of them do take the trouble of adding me again; others, probably don’t even realize they were deleted. Even then, I have over 1000 people on my list. I interact with less than 10% of them on an intermittent (forget regular) basis. Still, they exist in my space in the same manner I exist in theirs.

Even in real life, I’ve been doing regular cleanup. While I am quite hot-tempered, as a person I am very patient in all my relationships. Up to a point, I will keep tolerating and ignoring the flaws until I reach the tipping point. Then the claws come out, and being confrontational by nature, I decide whether it’s possible to make the equation work, or if it is time to just let go. Letting go isn’t always easy — but I’ve been pretty good at it. My mind has this AMAZING erase button that just wipes out any traces of that person’s existence in a jiffy. Some call it a pretty ruthless mechanism, but it’s better to ignore those voices — not everyone you lose in your life is a loss. By getting rid of people who aren’t going to help you in a positive manner and only make your space negative deserve to be thrown out, because in return you will gain a better life for yourself.

It isn’t easy. It never is. Remember the persons most difficult to get rid of are the ones who are truly putting you to the test. Sometimes, by losing them, you are not just losing the dreams your harboured, or pushing the memories you shared at the back of your mind, but you are also losing those ignored calls and messages, those neglected cries for help — you are basically getting rid of your emotional abuser, and that is never a bad thing.

Lose those people. They don’t deserve you! Don’t waste your energy or tears on them. Find your voice. Find yourself. Win your life back!