Day 105: Love #365DaysOfWriting

Recently, I picked up Jonah Lehrer’s A Book About Love which tries to weave together scientific studies from psychologists, historical accounts and literature, as well as longitudinal studies on health and happiness, in order to uncover the mysteries of the so-called phenomenon of “love”.

Close friends know me to be a cynic. I believe, like neuroscience, that love’s delight is nothing but a dopamine rush (a spasm of a specific neurotransmitter lingering too long in the synapse). But, this cynicism has not stopped me from falling prey to this crazy little thing called love. Even if you know it’s just chemistry or biology at play, you can’t stop yourself from feeling that sudden wave of excitement when you see your phone-screen flashing with a call notification from that special someone; that stupid grin does not leave your face as you think of the last time the two of you spoke.

Many people come and go. Some are easily forgotten. Some just don’t seem fun after a point of time. We outgrow a couple of others. But, there are some people who just never get boring. There are some people whom we never want to leave. We claim to love them. Even if we know it is classical conditioning, the process of giving them up is rather copious.

Love can have various definitions. It exists in various permutations and combinations — infatuation, crush, one-sided love, friendship, conditional/unconditional love, obsession — which makes it difficult to come up with one, universal definition. Love may be all around us. Sometimes, it may seem difficult to find. Sometimes, it could be false. But, love is the most wonderful thing in the world, and to be able to experience love in all its forms in one life can be quite an achievement.

According to me, love is a feeling that surpasses all our senses into a sense of joy, fulfillment and sharing. The path of love has its ups and downs, but it is a bilateral flow of emotions, and a connection which you can feel with your last and every atom. Time is an imaginary construct, and I don’t think true love can be defined as a relationship that stood the test of time. It does not matter if the time was short, the power of love cannot be measured in times, but in the intensity of the moments spent together.

What is your definition of love?

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