Let’s Just Put All the “Shoulds” on Hold: A Psychologist’s Tricks for Unshaming Yourself

(This post was originally published on Techealthiest, a how-to guide on the Technology of Health and Happiness.)

“I should think positive and avoid negativity.”

“I should use this time to accomplish something.”

“I should be cooking more often.”

“I should learn a new language.”

“I should exercise on a schedule.”

“I should be eating healthy.”

My advice on the best response to these five “should” statements: No, no, no, no and no.

Why should you reject these recommendations? For starters, this is not the time to accomplish much. The Covid-19 pandemic is creating a sustained sense of mental heaviness, the likes of which we’ve never felt before.

It feels as though gravity has become a heavier force that opposes everything we want and need to do. It pushes back on our efforts to take care of ourselves. All of the world’s suffering brought on by the spread of the coronavirus, coupled with how depressing it is to be confined to the inside of our homes creates a sense of burden that rages against our best efforts.