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We all fall prey to cognitive distortions.

These are beliefs we convince ourselves are true that reinforce negative thinking. You know the ones:

“I’ll never amount to anything.”

“Nobody likes me.”

“I’m not good enough.”

“I can’t do this.”

“I’m a failure.”

“I don’t deserve success / to be happy / love.”

And on and on. Even if the thought is more complicated, it typically boils down to some variation on the above.

While these belief systems might feel like they have been engraved in stone, they are actually choices you are making to keep the belief alive. …

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We all want meaning in what we do. We feel our work is meaningful when it feels like a natural extension of our personality.

Far too often, due to the demands of living, we find ourselves in jobs and positions that have nothing to do with our true nature.

That’s when we start reading “how to create work / life balance” blogs. In a perfect world, these two [work/life] wouldn’t be on opposite ends of the spectrum; they would be interwoven, natural extensions of each other.

When we leave our house to go to work, we should be heading to a place that makes as much sense to our lives as does the bed we sleep in. After all, we spend a great deal of time at work, so it should ideally relate to who we are. …

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We’re no stranger to the feelings of envy. A coworker gets the promotion you thought you deserved; a friend’s career skyrockets past yours; someone else somewhere did something that you didn’t even know you wanted but now you do.

Most everyone has at one time or another felt a twinge of envy or jealousy about a colleague’s success, or delight at his or her failure.

We compare ourselves to those who seem superior to us (upward comparison), those who seem inferior to us (downward comparison), and those who seem similar to us (proxy comparison). …


Dr. Nicole Lipkin

Bringing human nature back into business. Organizational Psychologist | Speaker | Coach | Author |

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