I Am A Transwoman. I Am In The Closet. I Am Not Coming Out.
Jennifer Coates

Hey there Jennifer! 
Wow, lots to think about here! It’s important for people to realize that how we look and are perceived often don’t match the identity we feel inside. A lot of what you said resonated with me, and while I happen to be a straight female, I’ve generally identified as female out of necessity or convenience. In actuality, I don’t feel male or female, but presenting female is the easiest for my job, for finding boyfriends, etc. I’ve considered getting surgery to get rid of my boobs, but even a cursory search shows that this desire isn’t valid because I’m average boob size, and the money and cutting make it harder to want. I realize this is not on the same level as your discomfort with your body, but hopefully anyone who has had discomfort can at least relate to what you’ve said. 
Feminism is meant to equalize the sexes and remove masculine and feminine qualities from hobbies, personality traits, and jobs. Anything that borders on man-hating or silencing is toxic, and doesn’t help women achieve what they want. We need men, women, and everyone in between on board if we want feminism to succeed, if we want a world where children can just be kids allowed to explore who they are without judgement or correction. 
Your story is unique, but probably not as unique as people think because these stories often go untold. Thanks so much for sharing.

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