This is the first time my theory of convenience vs time doesn’t exactly apply. Or maybe it does.
It does feel however like you’re making the cardinal mistake most men who value intimacy in sex make. You’re assuming instead of simply asking the women you are attracted to if they want to ‘fuck’.
The whole organic sexual chemistry, leading to great sex thing is largely a myth, especially when you give off nice guy vibes. The friendlier you are, the more you suggest that they be ‘friendly’ too. And you people end up spending an entire evening being nice, and wishing each other a good night without actually fucking and doubting if there was any chemistry in the first place.
Alternating between dates that are solely for fucking, and dates that are solely for ‘friending’ could be a good way to go around it.