«Never change to fit other people» is the worst advice you ever got.

It’s not that I don’t understand where the «advice» is coming from. That you shouldn’t be a copy of everyone else and that you should hold on to what makes you unike. But what who knows what makes you unike? This isn’t a video game. You don’t pick your traits and attributes, you just play the game. I mean live your life, the attributes come along as you play. Er, Live.

If you are supposed to never change in order to fit other people, you will never fit other people. Change is a big part of life and it is a very important part of life. When learning a new game or sport you don’t keep holding on to everything that makes you horrible at the game, you change and perfect your technique. The same goes for relationships. You learn what makes a good friend and what makes a bad friend, you try to be a good friend, you practice and perfect your social skills.

Sometimes love isn’t about how much someone suits you, but how much you’re willing to change in order to fit them. -Alexisonfire, Rough Hands

One thing I like about the «advice» is that it expects a lot from everyone else. If you won’t change, everyone else will have to. Well, not everyone, the world doesn’t revolve around you. But you can’t keeping chasing everyone else. At some point you will have to demand that others make sacrifices just like you have. Because if you are willing to change so much to fit one person that your whole life is all off a sudden revolving around that person, and they don’t even like you that much, well. That’s not fun.

But before you can demand that others change, you yourself will have to learn to change.