Interesting, though I can’t help wondering…

Perception changes so easily that I’ll call it fragile. It’s not permanently fragile, because many of our perceptions persist for long times, but like so many things in life, the effort to determine how we are perceived changes how we are perceived.

When we ask for an observation, the observer will become aware of their own perception of us and now they have a new component of self awareness that informs them of how they may have been perceiving us. This self awareness changes them. They now perceive you differently or at least try to seem as though they do. This is not a bad thing. It allows us to form stronger bonds with others, and with strangers.

We were on vacation and this gruff red faced bald guy was bitching to the hotel staff as we were checking in. We both commented to each other that this guy was an asshole and we secretly dubbed him “high blood pressure guy”.

The next evening we were sitting around the pool sipping a glass of fine rum when we see HBP guy dancing shirtless to the music. We laughed and his wife, who was three chairs down heard us. She said something like “at least your not married to him! Hey Magic Mike get over here and sit down” in a thick Brooklyn accent. From then on we all laughed about it and talked. Turns out he has a few young granddaughters and was getting a bit of stressed having to take care of them while on vacation. We had fun and got along well. Turns out he’s not an asshole at all, just a family man who gave too much of his time away to his family on one particular afternoon…

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