Days 33, 34— Find Yourself
“I have crossed oceans of time to find you” and even though I haven’t yet “I can see lights in the distance.”
Between Thursday’s Dracula and Friday’s Loreena there’s than ocean.
Dracula’s quote “I have crossed oceans of time to find you” was directed at his lover but as a 23 year old who’s still searching for purposes and goals I’m going to redirect it. I am still crossing oceans and continents and universes of time to find myself, as apparently are others.
Some of us move from school to university to work or other experiences at such a fast pace that most of the times it creates a shock as we come to deal with different worlds. At the same time we’re experiencing things differently every year and changing our minds and opinions about most things. So as we are learning to deal with a new external environment, we are also dealing with a radically changing internal one as well.
Not knowing where we stand on ideas, causes and problems that we never thought we’d have to deal with; Ideas we always thought ourselves too young to think about and never took too seriously. We start finding the need to develop an opinion about everything around us without ever getting the confirmation whether they are right/correct opinions or if there is more that we don’t know, as it used to be at school. All within the search of figuring out who we really are and how we want to present ourselves to the adult world, which we still see as something far and too early to think about.
Some of us are enter that fierce, competitive, blood-sucking world at a slow pace while others receive a blow to the face and are forced to cross that threshold in a week. In both cases, it sucks.
At some point, I hope, it will get clearer, as we will to ourselves. Our opinions become our own and no one else’s and then confirmation wouldn’t matter. All that would matter is being sure of the logic behind the convictions that help shape our identity.