Waking Up From Hope
The alarm goes off precisely at 6:15am every morning. Some days you can awake with a fervor and indescribeable motivation to conquer the day ahead. Other days, that alarm goes off and you don’t even have the energy to turn it off. You will lay there and allow the slow, methodically buzzing to lull you back to sleep. Back to the false reality that somehow makes sense. The reality that is better.
On these days, the alarm is but a reminder that you don’t always get what you want but that that is perfectly fine. On these days, the goal can be to finish a large project and the laundry list of other meticulous tasks you have set aside and finish the day with a sense of satisfaction that you have succeeded in life. On these days you are free, you are happy, and you are worriless.
Some may have names for these days. But for you, they do not have a name. They are simply days that you know you are going to be able to push yourself harder and drive yourself to reach that finish line, or at the very least: to vow to try again. In the end, that is what life is about: trying.
Pushing yourself to your mental and physically limits until your body, and your mind, and your soul scream to stop. Some days you will give in to these voices and allow them to halt your progress. But on these days you will plow through those voices like a freight train going far too fast, with no brakes, and a shortening track that ends in a wall. Undiscouraged, you keep going and fight on even though you may not know what is going to happen when you get to that wall.. All you know is that there is something there past the obstacle and you will stand tall and proud when the lay crumpled behind you.
On these days you will realize that with each new obstacle, this is only the begining. You will realize that you are just getting started into this joyful and wondrous experience we call life. You realize that you have so much left to see, so much left to do, and even if you can not get to do or see it all today, there will be a time. There will be a day, when all of the things will fall into place.
This hope and these feelings can fill your whole mind with such euphoria that you think you may never come down from the natural high they bring. You may think that your childlike motivation and euphoria can never end; like the eight year old who can not be convinced that he will not be an professional baseball player. Or the five year old who is oblivious to any wrong in the world and just wants to just butterflies through a never ending meadow. Your mind and your potential to succeed in life will be endless.
But that’s the thing with these days: You always wake up from them.