A Cornucopia of Thoughts
Last week both my kids and husband finished up their rounds of antibiotics. Infected ears and sinuses were around every corner of this disheveled house. I had the same symptoms for 12 days but stayed in a happy land of denial before caving and calling my Dr yesterday. So I’m not bringing my A game into this week. Oh no, I’m still just as productive as usual, since that’s what sick Moms do, isn’t it? Now things are just getting done without a smile or makeup on.
I had to pick up more Motrin and my husband’s antibiotic before the grocery store last week. It was just me and my 3-year-old son. It’s amazing how different, how much easier it is with just half the amount of toddlers at the store. Ever heard the saying “One is like one. Two is like twenty”? What a perfect comparison. I didn’t make him get in the cart because he followed closely. Didn’t have to worry if he was poking his finger into the fresh ground beef like he did last time. It was nice. A round gentleman went by on a motorized shopping chair provided by the store. This particular shopper didn’t appear elderly or like he had a disability to his lower extremities. But I’m a compassionate adult with medical experience who understands there are hidden impairments. My son is a child. A funny child who says and acts precisely how he’s feeling in the moment. There’s always that moment of fearful suspense from the second my kids see someone out of the ordinary to the second I hear their voices begin to ask a question. My son said “Hey he’s not walking, see Mommy?” “Sshh yes I see” I answered. We got closer and my son asked the man “Why yerr not walking? Yerr funny! Can I try?” The man completely ignored us but I told Jude he has trouble walking so he’s using a wheelchair, and no, it’s not for him to try.
Another time a beautiful woman, who happened to be a dwarf, was walking by us in a parking lot. The twins and I were holding hands and she was walking toward us. There was that suspenseful feeling I told you about. My daughter saw her and said a quick and startled “Oh” while looking up at me with her hand over her mouth. “It’s okay, sshh” I said quietly as we kept on walking. My son was busy touching the bumpers of each parked car, but he saw her. “Hey!” he exclaimed as she was (hopefully) several feet away “I never seen her before” he said. Lola asked “Is that a kid or a Mommy?” I was relieved as those were mild questions and statements, not as strikingly offensive as they could have been. We got inside the store and I explained, as casual as you like, that she was not a kid and no we’ve never met her before. I told them all people are different sizes and everyone looks different from each other and that’s okay. I stressed that most importantly we don’t say it out loud because it might hurt their feelings. Then I got them in the shopping cart.
I want my kids to feel comfortable asking me questions about things that are new or confusing to them. Therefore, I try to keep my body language, expressions and tone of voice relaxed and matter-of-fact. My daughter and I were in Bath & Body Works and two pre-teenaged girls walked in. One of them said “What is this?” and picked up a sphere the size of a baseball. The other answered “It’s a bath bomb, stupid.” Lola said to them “You can’t say that. Right, Mom?” I nodded and kept smelling my soap “Nope shouldn’t call someone stupid, you’re right Sis.” We moved on while the girl looked embarrassed. That night as we were getting ready for bed, my daughter said “Why did she say stupid at the mall today?” I answered “Well, she made a bad choice.” My daughter goes “Yeah that’s not really nice. Like ‘holy shit’ is a bad choice to say.” I stifled a laugh and said “That’s right, we don’t say that.”
So back at WalMart last week, just my son and I. We’re at the deli counter waiting for this woman to order. She has frizzy hair, animal printed frames to her thick lensed bifocals, a Tweety Bird tshirt that says “I can’t even”, leggings and fuzzy slippers. She took a long time. We waited while she sampled different hams: maple, smoked, mesquite, old fashioned. She turned around and said “I’m sorry for takin up your time I just gotta get it right you know?” Yes, I know. You seem like a precise individual.
I do believe you can tell a lot about someone by the items in their cart. She had a bag of onions, a case of canned cat food and a horror movie in the cart. Another employee helped us as the Ham Sampler continued on. I’ll never know what she decided on. But I do know, by the items in her cart, that she had a pleasant evening ahead.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to stir the spaghetti sauce on the stove and get my kids up from nap. My happy hour with you has ended. We should do this more often…
