Oy Vey, Jon Stewart, You Broke My Heart
And right before Valentine’s Day!
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, MY LOVE?
Did you hear the news?
My secret fantasy, the love of my life, my all-time JewCrush, has broken my heart.
OY, the PAIN!
#1 JewMom heartthrob: Jon Stewart.
(We profess love for the dreamy Max Greenfield — Schmidt of “New Girl” — however, he’s a bit young for a true midlife fantasy as he’s about the same age of our sons — and there’s something not quite right with that scenario, if you know what I mean.)
Don’t misunderstand — I have a special place in my heart for my erstwhile tugboat man; after all, we’ve been married for just about twenty-one years, but JON STEWART owns a huge piece of my heart (the Jewish part.)
Those blue eyes, that soupçon of unruly hair that falls rakishly across his forehead, his sort of creepy and girlish giggle — even his UBER hairy hands — no one else measures up.
His wit, his humor, his singular delivery, even his SINGING — I’m fanning myself- what will I do?
How will I survive?
What about NEWS? What about VIEWPOINT?
Don’t worry, hub knows all about how I feel about Jon — he shares the love — and never misses “Your Moment of Zen”.
We trust The Daily Show to deliver the kind of UN-biased news that reflects our perspective, our cynical and mocking attitude toward all that is political…
And he has rescue dogs! Rescue! Dogs!
I’m planning a trip to the east coast to visit Professor Angel Boy; WHAT IF I WAS IN THE AUDIENCE FOR A TAPING OF JON’S SHOW?
WHAT IF WE MET?
That would be totally awesome.
The stuff of dreams, my friends. The stuff of dreams.
Jon’s First Daily Show
My previous posts about Jon Stewart:
Dear Jonathon Stuart Lebowitz
The Real Meaning of Thanksgiving
Originally published at enchantedseashells.com on February 11, 2015.