Before you do anything, read this post, work yourself into a mood and fester unproductively for the next several hours…

That’s right. If you’d been having a good day, it’s time for that to end. I’m going to write about things you completely disagree with, and, I’m going to be smug about it, too.

You’re shaking your head already, disgusted with my opinion, or, possibly with the many people who share my opinion. It’s aggravating because you know you’re right about this. Like, know know.

I’ll say a few things that’ll make you feel better, but then I’ll remind you that that’s not my point at all. I’ll even cap off the paragraph with the most inflammatory thing I’ve said yet.

At this point you’re articulating a full thesis rebuttal in your head. There’s so many things wrong about what I’m saying, you don’t even know where to begin. You can’t believe there are people like me who not only think like I think, but have convinced thousands of others to think like I think.

Oh, and, here’s something wacko I don’t really believe to be true, but, eff it, my readers love this shit.

And, since you were just reading to work yourself into a rage, because that’s the type of person you are, well, here’s an ad hominem attack against turds like you.

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