It’s All About Relationships
Butterflies in the stomach… mind racing… feet fidgeting… Have you experienced any of these feelings when starting a new job? I know I have.
These sensations are common for many of us, especially in the era of the gig economy when people move frequently between jobs, projects, and even cities/countries. With constant change as the new normal, how can we set up our workplaces, teams, and ourselves for success?
Let’s build authentic relationships
Earlier this year, I was concerned about the prospect of joining a new team, delivering results within a short period of time, and most importantly building new relationships within (and gasp!) outside of my organization. To explore this challenge, Elissa Dodd and I hosted a discussion where we asked our peers to reflect on the practice of relationship building.
It came to our attention that some people feel comfortable connecting with colleagues over time; however, relationship building can be challenging during short-term and remote work based projects.
We also learned that authentic relationships are important because we are people (not robots!) who value social connection, and that strong relationships make it easier to give and receive feedback, to have difficult conversations, and to be more creative when problem solving.
“[Great] leaders recognize that relationship building and building a better world are deeply interconnected. In so doing, they also make their (organizations) talent magnets for workers seeking a sense of purpose and meaning in the workplace…As our work world becomes more virtual and our business model more digital, the key determinant of sustainable success is less about the power of an (organization’s) algorithms than it is about the efficacy of the relationships we forge.” — Douglas Ready
As Elissa and I learned about the importance of relationships, it led us to a final question… How can we build authentic connections?
Small but powerful tips quickly emerged. From taking the time to get to know your colleagues and their passions, to showing vulnerability and humility for more human connections, and even putting a photo in your Microsoft Outlook profile to put a face on your emails. Small gestures make a big difference.
These words of advice resonated and reminded me of four relationship building principles from Keith Ferrazzi’s book Never Eat Alone:
- Generosity — Support and add value to the people around you.
- Vulnerability — Share personal challenges and failures.
- Accountability — Follow through on promises.
- Candor — Speak honestly and value candid conversation.
I’m still going to feel nervous every time before I start a new job/project, but I also know that the foundation of my well-being and my professional impact is strong relationships. How do you develop, nurture, and sustain relationships in your work? Feel free to comment below or to reach Elissa and myself on Twitter @EricRShoesmith and @DoddElissa.
Further Reading
Keith Ferrazzi, Never Eat Alone, 2014
Dan Schwabel, Back to Human, 2018.
Otto Scharmer, Leading for the Emerging Future: From Ego-System to Eco-System Economies. 2013
Adam Grant, Give and Take. 2013.
