leaving islam, or “how i reversed my conditioning”.
haider saleem

I loved reading this. A lot of young people do not actually take religion, philosophy and spirituality seriously; you are one who does and I was as well. So I identified very much with your story.

When I was a little older than you, I also broke with my family to embrace a new spiritual outlook. I also spent a year away from them and during that time suffered serious mental health issues/nervous breakdown. With time I reconnected and found things had shifted with my family; they were more open minded and willing to embrace things that they would not have before. Eventually I integrated a new life and grew stronger in my own identity.

I felt from what you said that you deeply respect and love some things about Islam, i.e. the elements that emphasize peace and love, but you have a moral issue with the hate — meaning the shade for people of different religions, sexual orientations, women etc. I commend you for speaking out at great personal risk against these belief systems as they are indeed dangerous in practice. You are feeling guided by your truth within and that is a beacon worth following.