How we limit our own success

We live within the walls of a society that taught us to compare and not concede

I believe that true success is a self-actualized notion.

We were born into competition.From sperms bolting for the egg to childhood to teenage years and work life, we've understood our own success relative to the next person’s. We cannot exist singularly in a society, comparison and competition is therefore inevitable.

Toner, fitter,better-looking, more social, more intelligent, more creative, more accepted — these are what we measure ourselves against others with. Which leads to the question: are we using the right scales? How should we really measure ourselves? How can we allow ourselves to live within the scales that have been preconceived for us, scales that do not account individuality and circumstance?

The only scales of success we know are the ones that society has taught us: these are often limited to affluence, career, good looks, intelligence and influence. What happens is we compete and base ourselves on these scales, and from there we feel that we aren't good enough. And then we feel envy or bitterness towards the next person; if we can’t be what they are. We corrupt ourselves. We plant weeds where there could be flowers; we damage our own success. We drown in these weeds.

The most successful people are the people that define their own success. They recognize it themselves and seek to create more success. It’s like failing a math test but failing it with a grade higher than usual. You could consider this successful even if your classmates aced the test. And you slowly work your way to a passing grade, and then becoming the best math student you can be.

No, this is not being content with what you have now. It’s about understanding and realistically crafting your own limits, and then pushing yourself to those limits. No one has grown up in identical circumstances or is biologically wired in the same way. Therefore, using another person’s limits as your own will only make you a sad person, especially if you can’t reach those limits.

Break out of these walls that society has placed us in. True success is a self-actualized notion. You might have thousands of people clapping for you but still feel like shit as you receive a second-prize medal. Why? Because you've based your success on what they define to be success. Stop! Define your own success by understanding your own limits. Don’t let society, anyone else, do it for you.

It’s about being the best you can be, not the best there is to be. Recognizing your own potential and focusing on your own path. Conceding with the fact that you are who you are, you’re not the next person.Work with what you’ve got and don’t fall victim to what is society’s ideal definition of success. Live being at peace with yourself.

That is true success.