This Old Dude Claims to Be Hitler, But He Probably Isn’t Hitler

Alright, stop me if you’ve heard this one before: A 128 year old man living in Argentina claims he is Adolf Hitler. Yeah right, I’m not falling for that again.

This story was published on The Nation, a website that I did not know existed until today, so I have no idea if any of it is real. It doesn’t really matter though, because it got me thinking, “what if Hitler actually was still alive?” Man, that would be pretty fucked up, right?

Look, it’s not entirely impossible that this demented old fuck is actually Hitler. It’s extremely unlikely, but it’s also fitting that in this fucked up world we’re still coexisting with an apparently immortal Adolf Hitler.

Think about it, most of you guys have lost someone really important to you. Grandparents, regular parents, and close friends, and meanwhile ADOLF HITLER is chilling down in Argentina playing shuffleboard and shit. God damn that’s fucked up.

But hey, come on now. This dude’s not really Hitler. He probably is a former Nazi who ran off to Argentina after the war, and as a result is probably a really fucked up dude. However, we can all take solace in the fact that this guy will probably bite it any day now after he chokes on his on spit.