Why I Decided to Vlog on youtube With Zero Subscribers.

Sidenote: Hi, my name is Eden McKenzie-Goddard, I’m 21 years old and a creator of worlds; screenplays, novel and confidence building videos. I welcome you on this exciting journey, so we can help achieve our dreams, together.

(Link to video is at the bottom of the article)

Fear is as much of an optional relapse to a vast dreamer, as alcohol is to a thirsty AA member. It is a drug that gives you the feeling of heavy intensity, and if embraced, acts as the come down after the legal high that once scared you – your dreams.

Publicly creating a video of myself was literally one of my worst nightmares. I am a sociable guy, I am confident, but my online persona is slightly different to the one I have in person. I’m more reserved in person than the 140 characters of twitter will allow me to be, so filming my life for even a day, was extremely uncomfortable for me.

So, imagine we are all in a room right now, chairs gathered in a circle:

We are now in what I would like to ingeniously call, the fear circle (took me three days to coin this) and both you, and I, come to this place to admit our regrets. Not complete regrets because we still have the opportunity to change them. It is never too late.

So, I’ll start. I invite you to vocally or mentally take part if you are willing.

“My name is Eden McKenzie-Goddard and I’m afraid of failure.”

Your turn. Admit your greatest fear to yourself and mentally see it before you.

Fear is very very real, and even as I type this. Fear (let us personify it) is screaming falsities in my ear:

“Who do you think you are exactly?”

“There is nothing special about you”

Or Fear's favourite:

“Just give up. It’s hopeless”

So I decided to step out, and challenge myself. Do something I was scared of attempting with the thickest earplugs to ignore fears voice in my ears.

I made a conscious effort to not only vlog (video log) my journey to Amsterdam, but to snapchat myself every day, reminding my list of snapchat friends, I WILL upload a video.

Accountability : I have now verbally made an agreement with people. Something that when recorded, can, and has, been used to either make or break a court case.

I vocalised my intention so I couldn’t run away and look like a coward. Cowardice is far more of a motivation than fear is a deterrent. (It may just be my pride catching up with me really. But when has that ever stopped me)

Visual Aids:

I have a dream board of everything motivating me to work harder. Things I want in life (you’ll see the image of a photoshopped me under my future g-wagon Mercedes. My face, but a body builders body, my girlfriend in the purple trousers)

But lastly, I did it because it was fun. I love being creative, and like any muscle, my mind needs to be trained. I needed a new form of creativity, and through attempting to vlog, I found something new. Youtube.

So I want you to set yourself a challenge this week, and then I want you to notice yourself achieving it. Because what may be easier for others, is almost inconceivable to some.

I challenge myself to continually vlog at a growing pace, but to also commit to my dreams. I’m making myself accountable to your positive perceptions of me. Are you going to shake my hand and do the same?

Comment below so I know whose hand I am shaking by the way. Make your dreams public and be fearless, even if it just for one day.

My name is Eden McKenzie-Goddard.

Thank you for reading.

Watch the Vlog down here:


Connect with me on Twitter, Linkedin (Eden McKenzie-Goddard and Medium)

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