My Fear Of Creating (And Perhaps Not-So-Ironically, My First Medium Post)
Olivia Durr

I’m happy to see you coming out of the dark shadows of the interwebs. ;) Many people choose to stay in the “safe zone” forever and keep their opinions (mostly) to themselves and to those they feel safe sharing with offline. But yes, there is great power and benefits to sharing online…and we are never alone in our thoughts and opinions.

When I was in WCE and Erika Napoletano spoke to our class (much to the weariness of some of our faculty who invited her) she confirmed my belief in saying whatever the f*ck you want to say, however and whenever the f*ck you want to say it, as she would say. :) She also said it’s better not to sit on the fence about things and just pick the damn side you stand on and people will stand with you. The others don’t matter as you said in your post. This is true.

For me, I’ve always said bluntly what I feel and think and it’s usually not the most politically correct, “safe”, or “appropriate” for all occasions and audiences. This horrified my mom who grew up trying to hide a lot of things from a lot of people out of whatever fear was within her about people knowing the truth (even when it was about me). She is barely getting over that fear now that we’re Facebook friends and she understands I’m very different from her and most people. ;) She is in her 70s. Brené I believe is pretty up there in age as well by the time she gave in to the fear and gave that TED talk. To that extent I feel lucky that fear about what others think of me didn’t bother me so much. Although let me tell you there are still things from my past that I will never tell people. Things that did live (what I thought would be forever) online but are now so far in the past and so far in Google archives that they are impossible to find even when you know exactly what keywords to look for. Believe me I still try to find these things every once in a while when I’m curious. Lol

I also don’t mind my thoughts and opinions being permanently out there anymore. Everything we think today will be different 6 months or 5 years from now and that’s okay. This is a huge reason why I don’t pay attention in politics when people argue that so and so keeps “changing their mind” about their stance on “this and that”. In my mind I think, GOOD. That’s called growth. Not being stuck in your old ways for the sake of keeping your stance on something is a good thing. We all go through that. We don’t know everything there is to know. When I hear some young people talking about things in a certain way that I used to believe but no longer do, it reminds me that older people probably feel that way when I’m speaking about certain things. I’m also grateful to learn from older people and I spend a lot more time listening than I spend talking. I also like to let young people talk through things too. Whether I agree with them or not. I listen and then state my own opinions when I feel so inclined. How else would any of us learn from each other?

To me, it’s scarier NOT to publish online. I don’t want to sit back and watch everyone else shape the world around us. That’s how life is offline. Extroverts pretty much shape most things because introverts don’t often interrupt them or aren’t given enough time (and patience) to express themselves in the way we normally would. It’s not about being “shy” or “quiet” as most extroverts like to think. It’s about processing time. But that’s a WHOOOOOLE other story.

Publishing online to me, is a whole lot closer to “the real world” than what most people call “the real world”. Online, all opinions and voices have the opportunity to be heard and expressed at their own pace and time. Apparently, now is YOUR time. :) I look forward to reading your stuff. The Internet needs more good people like you to share things. There is way too much bs out there. Lol

Cheers to your first Medium post! ❤️