Tips on what to do when you forget your pants…
Day 137 — What to do when you forget your pants? First, you have to admit you have no pants. No! I refuse to believe this. A couple of curse words slip out as I rifle through my suitcase early this morning, following a long delayed flight out of town on business. Shock. Disbelief. Pant-less. Pajama-less too. So what’s a girl to do? I briefly considered just going with it! No pants. No problem. Except for everyone else. And probably the police.
So off I go to shop for pants and PJ’s. I have the wind at my back since I’d just gotten off an airplane where I was able to fasten the seatbelt…aaaaaand…tighten it with some slack! WHAT!? I KNOW! It was a fantastic moment! I took a VERY awkward #selfie of my belly and the belt and texted it to my Director of New Business Development seated a few rows away. I overheard someone say something negative about it. But I didn’t care because I HAD SLACK ON THE BELT! Not a lot. Just a couple of inches but better than having to ask for an extender!
One of my weight loss goals is to shop in the regular, NOT plus sizes by my birthday (in a few days). I’ve lost almost 40lbs at this point and I’m optimistic as I enter the store. I take a quick glance at the regular sizes, panic and head straight to the sizes I know will fit. I’m almost sick to my stomach as I approach the plus department where previously a size 3X top was getting tight. I don’t know how it happened, but all of a sudden I’m looking at the 3X tops and they look big. I grab a couple of 1X and some pants in size 18. I figure I’m coming from a “tight” 24…which looking at them now look huge. I immediately discount the size 18/20 pair of pants at home that are too big and dismiss it as a fluke.
I’m thinking they look comfy. Ohhhh…comfy is a dangerous thought when you are trying to shed more than pounds. (Note the surprising profundity of the previous statement.) I head to the fitting room. The shirts fit “comfortably.” Cool! The pants? Too big? TOO BIG! All the fitting room lady saw were vapor trails! I ran to the petite department Mach II with my hair on fire. I grabbed a pair of size 16W (women’s size — but not “plus”). Black. It’s a habit. The fitting room lady gave me the once-over as she snapped her neck, combined with a “good luck with that” kind of look. Grateful they have a little stretch to them, I put my leg in and immediately flash back to when I couldn’t get this size up past my thighs. I quietly thanked God I was alone to suffer this humiliating #fail. Then they went up and I zipped it up! A couple of Cabbage Patch moves and a Moonwalk later, I’m on my way to pay. BAM! Next stop? Size 16 WITHOUT stretch! No comments needed about the “short” part. I’m standing tall today!
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