Self Care Sundays
Welcome back to Self Care Sundays! I hope your week went well and if it was difficult, I hope you spent some time on yourselves to rest, heal and do things you enjoy doing in all their simplicity and joy.
I felt an abundance of creativity this week, which I tried to balance with my non-creative, clerical job. In the midst of productivity, stress and moments of high anxiety, I tried to make some space for myself and I attempted to stay steady and feel grounded. I was somewhat unsuccessful, I can feel parts of myself go neglected for the sake of productivity.
This coming week I will reintroduce mindfulness exercises and meditation into my schedule in the hopes that I will stop feeling like my brain is moving faster than my body. In the meantime, reading about self care and resistance through always brings me to a more peaceful place.
This week I am excited to share my interview with Dani who took the time to share her experiences with self care and healing. I hope you enjoy reading her words as much as I did.
What does self care mean to you?
Self care is self preservation. Self care is healing. While I know this quote by Audre Lorde is probably quoted often in response to this question. I have to be another to reference it because as a Native woman it has really resonated on a personal level. The love and labor of Indigenous women is so essential for our communities; Sometimes its difficult to allow ourselves self-care because it feels selfish.
“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”
It has been said that being Native American is a political act, because our existence is so paradoxical to everything our society has internalized. But that truth becomes even more nuanced when you consider the experience of Indigenous women.
In a patriarchal and colonial society that doesn’t value Indigenous women and where we don’t have safe spaces, we have to do what we can to cultivate what safe spaces we do have, not only for our spiritual and mental health but for our survival. Too often prioritizing self care for ourselves is the epitome of self preservation, because there are not many spaces that do prioritize our wellbeing. Especially in a society where basic ideals of personhood are considered radical.
What are some of the things that you do for self-care?
I read and research. Sometimes things related to Native history, or social justice, other times subjects to get my mind off things completely.
I listen to music. It may vary upon my mood, but I feel most calmed by artist like Angel Haze and Frank Ocean. If I feel like I need to get negative energy out, I work out and that’s when Ill take it up a notch with A Tribe Called Red, Tanya Tagaq or heavy rock music like Otep and Slipknot.
I pamper myself whether that means a bath or painting my nails.
I enjoy Nature, and spend time with my twin sons.
I immerse myself in my culture and study the language. (Dakota/Lakota)
I consume art. Films, television shows, I collect images that calm me.
I post on the horror platform I cofounded (NeverDeadNative)
I write, I blog, mostly tweeting and brainstorming ideas for future writing. While tweeting can be work in itself, sometimes it is cathartic just in having a place to release frustrations that translate to larger conversations.
I surround myself with like minded people, whether its people that empathize with the experiences, or those who can help me “unplug” completely and just live life.
What advice would you give to womxn & femmes who are just learning to put themselves first?
Another aspect of self-care, is knowing that you are embracing your own self-preservation by knowing how to draw boundaries when necessary. In a society that tells us that our existence and our labor are not valued, we often are forced into a role to accept, or subvert that. Because most aspects of our personhood are up for exploitation, the act of simply denying that is revolutionary and necessary.
Sometimes we just need a little reassurance that we are worth putting ourselves first. I am constantly reminding myself that I am worthy and when I am in doubt I look to other voices that inspire me to find empowerment. There are many ways to put yourself first and be empowered, even if you do so by taking subtle baby steps, do what is right for you and not anybody else.
Above all else, know that your feelings are valid, your labor is valid, your personhood is valid. Don’t fuel an illusion that convinces you otherwise because the corrupt systems and social norms that exploit us, are reliant upon that illusion to keep that cycle of exploitation going.
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Thank you Dani! If you would like to support Dani and her work, here is her PayPal link: http://paypal.me/xodanix3
This column will be back next week. If you have any feedback or questions, feel free to contact me: larawitt@gmail.com
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