This is all I need to know. You’re right; I have no idea. But, as a social scientist, I do know the rhetoric of people who may do the right thing, but don’t realize they have some problematic perspectives. This is equivalent to White people who believe they aren’t racist because they have a spouse and/or children of color, because they marched with MLK, because they voted for Obama.

You may have saved women (b/c God-complex is a real thing), but you do not value us. If you did, you would NOT be trying to invalidate my experience here. You would be trying to understand where I’m come from and work from there.

In a parallel example, a trans woman responded on this thread. I am not a tran woman. I do not understand what tran people go through or even the process of why they decided to transition. Let me tell you what I don’t do- I do not argue with trans people. I do not tell them how good of a person I am because I fight for trans rights as a method of invalidating their experiences. I shut my ass up and listen. Then I tell them what skills I have and ask which manner is best for me to use these skills to help them. That’s all. THAT IS ALL.

Despite this, I believe you could be an advocate of women. You could be, but that starts with realizing you currently are not. This is not what advocacy looks like.

    Ashely "Flashe" Gordon

    Written by

    I'm awkward. Super awkward. So awkward that now people believe I'm cool. Cool. Snapchat: FindFlasheG

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