I will start off this entry just explaining a bit about who I am, and I guess what I am going to be writing about, which is me being a non-binary transgender “person”. I want to treat this as like journal entries to write about my thoughts……
I was born in one of the biggest cities in the United States, and come from a Hispanic background. I was raised by my mother (who I have a close relationship with) and my stepfather (who I consider my only father). This story sounds pretty generic, except, that for 21 years I have been living a life that has never felt like mine.
Since I was little I always knew I was different, but I didn’t quite understand it. I never told my mom “hey I feel like a boy”, and I never tried on my dad’s or brother’s clothes. I find it weird that I never went through that I guess “typical” process of a small child realizing they were born in the wrong body.
Yet, I knew something was different with me. Even though I never tried on my brother’s clothes I looked at them with envy. I loved his superhero shirts, and his polos that always look nice on boys. I enjoyed his toys and video games, getting dirty outside; pretty much everything “unlady” like I enjoyed. This automatically placed me in the tomboy category. A categorization I never felt comfortable with. So I tried to play with barbie dolls.
I remember my mom bought me a really nice Barbie mansion with a couple barbie dolls and Ken. When I would undress and dress the dolls, I enjoyed dressing Ken. It was my guilty pleasure. But it wasn’t enough.
As a confused 8–10 year old kid with identity issues I didn’t even know could exist I decided to play the tomboy card. I would dress like a girl and act like one, and I could also play video games and play sports.
I could be a tomboy and eventually grow out of that phase. At least I liked boys right?……